courage

Today’s Thought:

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Be proud of your scars. They have everything to do with your strength, and what you’ve endured. They’re a treasure map to the deep self. ~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes

NOTE: Author and poet, Robert Bly, wrote of conducting a men’s workshop where he asked the men to place a sticky note paper on every place in their body where they carried a scar, physically or emotionally. We all carry scars. No one is spared from scars caused by parents, siblings, classmates, or lovers. A scar happens each time someone is shamed for being different (add your own definition of different here). A scar happens each time we’re betrayed or treated unfairly. And, there are the physical scars if you’ve been physically abused. If we stay stuck thinking about our scars, we loose the gift they’re giving us. They give us the gift of being compassionate to other scar bearers. They give us the give us wisdom. They give us the gift of justice. They give us the potential of becoming a wounded healer of others who bear scars. Turn your scars into stars.

Today’s Inspiring Quote: Keep Moving Forward

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Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun, one’s feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lays defeat and death.” ~ Nelson Mandela

Today’s Thought: Look at You Now!

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“We are the sum total of our experiences. Those experiences – be they positive or negative – make us the person we are, at any given point in our lives. And, like a flowing river, those same experiences, and those yet to come, continue to influence and reshape the person we are, and the person we become. None of us are the same as we were yesterday, nor will be tomorrow.” ― B.J. Neblett

NOTE: We can’t run away. All of our experiences follow us wherever we go. We are who we are because of what we’ve experienced. If we examine our negative experiences, we don’t have to like them, but they shaped us. I have a friend who grew up in an emotionally abusive family. My friend shared that she and her husband promised each other they would never emotionally abuse their children. She learned from her negative experience and used it to shape her parenting and relationships with other people. When we can look at ourselves in the mirror and say, “I love you and everything you’ve been through. You are simply amazing. Look at you now,” we’ll have met someone special.

Today’s Thought:

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There was no doubt about it: if you wanted to succeed you had to go away. You could do nothing in Dublin. ~ James Joyce

NOTE: James Joyce was speaking about Dublin. Yet, in many ways his words can apply to all of us. I know they do to me. I’m a long way away, geographically and emotionally, from where I was as a child. I had a large extended family and most of them continue to live or die within 50 miles of where they were born. That life wasn’t meant for me. I grew up near the railroad tracks. I often dreamed of the trains taking me to far off adventures. If I stayed, as I was encouraged to do, I would’ve never seen what I saw, met the people that I met, or do what I never dreamed it was possible for me to do. You never know what’s out there waiting for you. Catch a train, board flight you’re meant to take, or take a ride share. Keep your eyes on star that’s leading you. Don’t be afraid, journey on.

Today’s Thought:

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“Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” – Nelson Mandela

NOTE: Call it falling down, knocked down, or disappointed in many ways they are gifts to us. Each time we are knocked down and get up, we become stronger, more resilient. It’s as if life prepares us for each succeeding stage of our journey. Yes, disappointments and the other events that knock us down hurt, but we’re stronger, tougher, more resilient than anything that takes a swing at us. Never quit. Never give up. Get up, get going, and show them all you got what it takes.

From Clenched Fist to Open Palm: Learning to Let Go on ‘Journey from Grief to Healing

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In “Journey from Grief to Healing: Episode 77,” we explore the poignant metaphor of John Anderson’s “Let Go of the Stone,” which symbolizes the burdens of grief. The narrator reflects on the personal significance of the song, comparing grief to holding a boulder, a weight that must be released to avoid drowning in heartache. It’s a solo journey—no one can rescue us. Letting go is not just a physical unclenching, but an emotional release from the stories that keep us anchored to our pain. The episode delves into the struggle to admit the comfort found in others’ condolences, the habitual retelling of our sorrows, and the moment of insight that compels us to finally put the pain aside. Letting go is likened to thawing a frozen grip, a difficult yet vital step towards healing. The narrative culminates in an uplifting realization: life awaits us, vast and hopeful, once we choose to let go and move forward.

You can listen to Episode 77 on your favorite podcasting app or click here for Episode 77

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Today’s Thought: Choose Life-Giving Attitudes

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The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives. ~ William James

NOTE: The choice is ours, it’s always ours. We can choose to be happy. Or, we can choose to be sad. We can choose to love. Or, we can choose to wear anger closer than our shadow. When we choose uplifting, life-giving attitudes, the change is not easy. There will be a struggle with attitudes that seek to repress and keep us in bondage. The expression, ‘fake it till you make it’ goes a long way in this struggle. We can ‘feel’ sad and simultaneously act happy. I think our natural state is one in which we’re happy and excited about life. This isn’t something we can buy online, on a street corner, or at a market. It’s something we have to claim and work hard to retain. Choose life-giving attitudes and states of mind.

Understanding The Brain’s Neural Pathways Through The Healing Process

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Welcome to episode 76 of Dr. Ray Calabrese’s podcast, “Journey from Grief to Healing.” In this enlightening and supportive episode, Dr. Ray delves deep into the process of grieving the loss of a spouse or partner and explains the neurological perspective.

Dr. Ray depicts the struggle of brain in adapting to the harsh reality of loss and the painstaking process of forming new neural pathways. Drawing upon an analogy of construction work, Dr. Ray distinguishes passive, informal learning from active learning and explains how applying what we learn helps our brains to reinforce the new pathways more swiftly.

Underlining the importance of patience during this significant phase, he implores us to continue learning, both passively and actively, at our own pace. Taking inspiration from renowned poet, Rainier Maria Relki, the episode emphasizes that patience is everything.

Moving towards a more healing approach, Dr. Ray suggests an incremental journey towards healing and self-reflection. Using the analogy of a swimming pool, the episode encourages listeners not to rush the process and instead take small, constitutive steps towards healing.

The episode concludes on a hopeful note, promising listeners that healing is indeed possible while navigating grief,. Dr. Ray Calabrese’s podcast offers a beacon of hope and positivism.

Listeners are also invited to connect with Dr. Ray through his blog and email (ray.brese@gmail.com), emphasizing the importance of communal strength in the face of traumatic life events.

You can listen to Episode 76 on your favorite podcasting app or click here for Episode 76.

Don’t forget to hit the subscribe button to receive notifications of future episodes

The Day to Free Yourself from Grieving

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Welcome to Episode 75 of ‘Journey from Grief to Healing‘ with Dr. Ray Calabrese. In this enlightening episode, Dr. Ray discusses the profound emotion and process of grieving that we all go through, emphasizing the idea that there will come a day when we must declare ourselves free from it.

Each person’s grieving timetable is unique and unpredictable, with no set calendar time signaling the end of grief. Sometimes, the grieving process can be lengthy, extending from formal cultural ceremonies to the informal grieving that remains with us when we are left alone.

As we navigate the multifaceted emotions of anger, guilt, sadness, fear, depression, and confusion during our grieving period, we also embark on a journey of self-discovery. Among the hard lessons we learn about life and ourselves, an enlightening realization of our resilience emerges.

At some point, our internal messenger will indicate when it’s time to move on, transitioning us into a stage of acceptance and inner freedom. And while this does not imply that the pain dissolves, it symbolizes our decision to live and experience life, despite the hurt. It is the conscious decision to step away from the grasp of grief, hold onto hope, and embrace the promise of a better tomorrow.

This episode draws upon references from F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway, among others, to underscore the transformative power of embracing change and resilience. The story of an older couple dealing with the loss of a partner further illustrates the societal misconceptions concerning grieving that can hinder personal healing.

Dr. Ray encourages listeners to stay strong, resilient, and hopeful for brighter days. The journey of healing is not linear or prescribed; it is deeply personal. Nonetheless, the power to break free from the constraints of grieving and embrace life with renewed vigor ultimately lies within us.

Explore more episodes of ‘Journey from Grief to Healing’ and follow Dr. Ray’s inspirational blog at http://www.dancingalone530.com. 

You can listen to Episode 75 on your favorite podcasting app or click here for Episode 75.

Don’t forget to hit the subscribe button to receive notifications of future episodes

Today’s Inspiring Quote:

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“You dream. You plan. You reach. There will be obstacles. There will be doubters. There will be mistakes. But with hard work, with belief, with confidence and trust in yourself and those around you, there are no limits.” — Michael Phelps

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