Why Pay for Cable When You Can People-Watch for Free and Get Six-Pack Abs from Laughing?

Hold on for 8, cowboy! You could spend over a hundred bucks a month on cable just to get scared by the weather, seduced by lasagna, and emotionally confused by soap operas—or you could save your cash and watch the greatest show on Earth: us.

I’m my area the cost of cable TV per month is well over $100. You get news channels that will make you want to run to the nearest bomb shelter. You get cooking channels that will make you gain 15 pounds by watching them. You’ll get movies and TV shows that start you believing that after a five minute conversation the couple knows each other well enough to jump in bed together. You’ll get weather channels that will make us run to the supermarket and stock up on food because we’re going to have an afternoon thunderstorm. Then there’s the buff guy and girl encouraging you pump it up. They’re telling you can have a body like their body. Really? If you stay with it, you’ll get a hernia quicker than a body like there body. I don’t have a TV. So I miss all this entertainment. I don’t think I’m missing much because I discovered the most entertaining thing I can watch is a fellow human being. I’m at the gym, for example, and I can see the buff bodies flexing and admiring their bodies in thei floor to ceiling mirrors. I think i can hear a muscled guy say, “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the most sculptured of them all?” The mirror replies, “If your latissimus dorsi were as toned as that woman doing pull ups, you’d be the most sculptured.” The mirror pauses, then adds, “I said her latissimus dorsi, no wonder you missed it.”Go to the supermarket, coffee shop, or a walk, it will be entertaining.

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