Let It Slide: How Suspending Judgment Can Save Your Relationships

When emotions run high, it’s easy to react and regret it later. Learning to suspend judgment might be the secret to keeping love intact.

Suspending judgement frees us from acting in ways we might later regret. A neighbor caught me walking one evening and I thinkj she needed to vent about her daughter. It was okay with me. I figured if I let a bit of the air out of her balloon she’d feel better. She went on to telll me how she called her daughter to “tell her off” because she didn’t come to a family gathering the previous weekend. The woman explained how she waited three days (It was a Wednesday) and still hadn’t heard from her daughter so she called her. Her first words were, “I was checking to see you were dead.” That was the high point of the conversation. The woman complained that her daughter disconnected the phone conversation. She believes her daughter has blocked her calls since all her attempts at calling go straight to messages.

Yes, the woman was upset. If she, however, let the incident slide and assumed her daughter had something more important to do their relationship wouldn’t be fractured. When we’re hurt by people close to us the hurt lingers. The same is true for those close to us who feel our warrh. Let it slide.

Reader Question:

Have you ever reacted too quickly and wished you had waited before speaking? How might suspending judgment have changed the outcome?