We all face big decisions. Most will ask others what they think about the choices. We may even do some research. In the end, the decision is ours. We can’t lay off blame on someone else. It is squarely on our shoulder. A mentor gave me three guidelines: 1) Never sell out. 2) Keep your soul intact. 3) Will you want everyone to know what you decided? I’ve tried to follow my mentor’s advice. Sometimes following his advice has caused me problems, but they were the kinds of problems caused by doing the right thing. I can live with myself. And, I think being able to live with yourself is a big deal.
decisions
Today’s Thought: Why Would You Do That?
There are things most people would do. Most people, for example, won’t put their hand on a hot stove. Most people won’t go outside in a thunderstorm and hold a metal rod high over their head. Most people won’t pick up a rattlesnake. It all makes common sense. We need to apply that same type of common sense to the people we choose to let in our lives. A set of guidelines to apply when deciding whether or not to let a person into your life is, does this person inspire me to be a better person? Does this person encourage me to continue to grow? How does this person treat other people? Don’t be conned. Look closely and make a good decision.
Feel Good Tip ~ The 8 Things The Happiest People Do Every Day
The Happiest People Do the Following. How many do you do?
- They devote a great amount of time to their family and friends, nurturing and enjoying those relationships.
- They are comfortable expressing gratitude for all they have.
- They are often the first to offer helping hands to coworkers and passersby.
- They practice optimism when imagining their futures.
- They savor life’s pleasures and try to live in the present moment.
- They make physical exercise a weekly and even daily habit.
- They are deeply committed to lifelong goals and ambitions (e.g., fighting fraud, building cabinets, or teaching their children their deeply held values).
- Last but not least, the happiest people do have their share of stresses, crises, and even tragedies. They may become just as distressed and emotional in such circumstances as you or I, but their secret weapon is the poise and strength they show in coping in the face of challenge.
Note; A wise person told me, “Ray we always find time to do what we want to do.” If I want to be happier, I’ll find time to make the items on this list part of my life. Is it time for a personal assessment on how you choose to spend you time?
Thinking Out Loud
Get Ready for the Unexpected
In Leo Tolstoy’s work, Three Questions, the King is fed up with the poor advice of his advisors. Instead, he seeks the advice of a wise hermit. “The King went up to him and said: “I have come to you, wise hermit, to ask you to answer three questions: How can I learn to do the right thing at the right time? Who are the people I most need, and to whom should I, therefore, pay more attention than to the rest? And, what affairs are the most important, and need my first attention?”
NOTE: When you’ve had an important decision to make have you sought the advice of friends and family and come away still not knowing what to do? I have. What do you do when that happens? I recall having this experience early on in my career. I was offered a great job. I knew if I took it my career path was set. I wasn’t quite certain that was the path to take. I turned to a trusted mentor. I went to his office and explained the job offer to him. He smiled at me and said, “Ray, I consult with people in that position all the time and they have one thing in common.” I moved to the edge of my chair waiting for his words of wisdom. I said, “What?” He said, “They don’t smile.” I laughed and said, “You’re right. In that moment, his wisdom, simply stated, influenced me. I went to my office and made the call declining the job. Sometimes it’s better to seek wisdom from those detached from us. When we do, we’d better be ready to hear something totally unexpected.
Thinking Out Loud
Do You Have a Life?
Joseph Campbell speaks about choosing a profession in Reflections on the Art of Living. He says, “There are two approaches to choosing a profession. One is to study the statistics on the number of jobs that are going to be available in this other category in the next 10 years and base your life on that. That’s following the rim of the wheel. The other is to ask yourself, “What do I want to do?” If you do that, then you are up against your decision. But if you say, “I am going to do what I want to do,” and if you stay with it, then something will happen. You may not have a job, but you will have a life, and it will be interesting. P.266
Note: I know excellent musicians who have not made the big splash, but they’ve followed their heart and kept playing music. Some play on the street with a jar for donations, some take any kind of gig they can get because it’s all about the music and their relationship to it. They take any job they can get to pay the rent and eat. They’re at their happiest when they are playing music, they have a life. Have you ever asked yourself “What do I want to do? Perhaps this is a good time to take the first step in asking that question and maybe finding the life you seek.
Today’s Positive Thought ~ Prize Inner Peace
“The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom (James Allen).” We all know the feeling in the pit of our stomachs when we are upset. We know what it feels like in the middle of the night when our mind will not quiet down. Seeking inner peace is a good goal for anyone. When we are peaceful we see more clearly. Our minds cease being cluttered and we make better decisions.
Where are you going?
Where are you going? Don’t Know? That’s a good thing. You’re not trapped into one way of thinking or being. When we’re not trapped into a single path, every path is open to us. We can pick and choose, try one out, if it doesn’t work, try another. There’s no need to worry about choosing a path, you’ll figure it out. One day you’ll look back and know you were on the right path all along.
Think About It
Some decisions are more difficult than others. When confronted with a difficult decision we often try to weigh all the choices. While we’re weighing the choices, we feel our stomach being tied into knots. Whoever is tying the knots in our stomach is pulling the knots tighter the longer we delay in making our decision. Once we decide, the weather clears and the road is wide open for us. What is the best decision? I’ve always felt the answer resides in my stomach. If every choice doesn’t satisfy my stomach, I’ve learned once I choose and force myself not to look back, it always works out. It has for me.
A Better Life ~ Seeing with the Heart
When we see with our heart, we no longer get caught in the trap of being for or against some issue. We can understand the value of opposing positions without being pulled into either side. We are free to make informed decisions guided by our intellect and not by our emotions. We’re not caught in turmoil, peace reigns in our hearts.
Today’s Power Thought ~ Make Your Own Decisions
Folks are always willing to give advice and much less likely to take advice. It’s wise to listen to what others have to say. It’s wiser to weigh it and make one’s own decision. We’re always better off when we make our decision based on our interests and made to make another happy with us.
