What does it mean to live rightly in a world that rewards convenience over conviction? In this episode of Optimistic Beacon, Ray explores how Socrates and J.R.R. Tolkien illuminate the moral life—where integrity, courage, and compassion form the true path to happiness. Discover why the good life isn’t about comfort or wealth, but about living with character and peace of conscience.
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You can tell the kind of person you are dealing with by their actions. I’ll give you a good example. One of my neighbors is an exceptionally good and caring person. A few weeks back I took her to the airport to catch a flight to Paris. She was going on an European vacation. It was an extended vacation, nearly 3 weeks. She shared lots of photos with clpse neighbors. I’m sure we were all envious of the fun and adventures she was having. When I dropped her off at the airport, I told her to text me a couple days before she was heading home and let me know the time of her flights so I could pick her up. Here is the action that describes the kind of person she is. She text me and said that during the past week, she had both bronchitis and Covid. She was sure she’s not contagious any longer, but she didn’t want me to take a chance and to get either bronchitis or Covid. She told me not to pick her up. She’d take a cab home. That is an act of thoughtfulness and kindness. She could have thought, I’m OK now I don’t have to say anything. She did, however, have the integrity to mention it and to take action. I’m happy I have friends like her. People you can trust and count on. I hope you have many of them as well.
Sleep with clean hands, either kept clean all day by integrity or washed clean at night by repentance. ~ John Donne
I had a colleague who lied. It didn’t take long to figure out that every time he/she moved his/her lips he/she was spilling a half truth, misrepresentation, or an outright lie. He/she was personally engaging so people ignored his/her lies. After a while those who worked with him/her knew they couldn’t trust him/her. The problem being, he/she was responsible for guiding students through their doctoral work. His/her students suffered because other faculty couldn’t trust him/her when he/she said his/her students were ready to defend their dissertation. Lying matters whether it is in an academic department, a relationship between two people, or by people running for office. People with integrity don’t knowingly lie to mislead others.
Today’s Thinking Out Loud reflection is on Harper Lee’s work, To Kill a Mockingbird.
“We’re paying the highest tribute you can pay a man. We trust him to do right. It’s that simple.” ― Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
Note: One can’t order trust online. Nor can one expect somebody to trust him/her without first earning that trust. Trust results from the accumulation of hundreds of small action. It only takes one act to destroy all the previous good acts. Once lost, it’s difficult to regain another’s trust. Trust is an imprint on one’s character. It’s indelible. We earn another’s trust by keeping our word, standing on trusted values, and never taking the cowards way out when facing difficult challenges.
“Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
James Allen in his book, “A man only begins to be a man when he ceases to whine and revile, and commences to search for the hidden justice which regulates his life. And as he adapts his mind to that regulating factor, he ceases to accuse others as the cause of his condition, and builds himself up in strong and noble thoughts; ceases to kick against circumstances, but begins to use them as aids to his more rapid progress, and as a means of discovering the hidden powers and possibilities within himself.” P. 25
As a Man Thinketh is available online at gutenberg.org under the Harvard Classics.
NOTE: those of us who have raised children may have asked them when they did something wrong, “Tell me what you did.” The child may blame sibling or denied doing it. Then it is the parents work to help guide the child to take responsibility. Do you know adults who act the same way? They blame others, they blame the circumstances, but they never take responsibility for what happened and blame themselves. It is difficult to trust people who don’t take responsibility and who whine and blame others for their situation. When we take responsibility and act accordingly we grow with integrity.
“Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity (W. Clement Stone).”
When we live a life marked with integrity we walk with our head held high, we make no excuses, we look others in the eye and not blink. We know we had the courage to face the truth, do the right thing at the right time, and the courage to say no to anything that is not right.
You can tell a person’s character by how he/she reacts under pressure, stress, or betrayal. When the odds are stacked against them, do they lie, cheat, or blame others? If they do, it is a sign of their character.
If, under the same pressure, stress, or betrayal, the person stands tall, walks with his/her head held high, and doesn’t change or shift his/her values, you’ve met someone special. They’ll stand by you in good and bad times. Keep them close by. It’s not easy to be such a person, something deep inside tells them they have no other way to act regardless of the cost.
