How many of your neighbors do you know? I grew up in a cold water flat tenement building by the railroad tracks. One thing the neighborhood had going for it was that each of the floors in the tenement buildings on the street had a porch. People strung clotheslines from the porch and hung out clothes to dry in the summer and freeze solid in the winter. On summer evenings people would sit on the porches and chat with neighbors in adjoining buildings or passing by on the sidewalk. Everybody knew everybody. That’s gone now. If we’re not careful we’ll live in nice homes and apartment buildings surrounded by lots of people yet knowing few. It takes courage and effort to connect with neighbors, to learn their name, and to stop and chat with them for a moment or two. Connected people have each other’s back.
neighbors
Thinking Out Loud: It’s Been a Good Year
2023 is quickly coming to a close. How has the year been for you? It’s been a good year for me. Here are 6 things that went well for me.
- I’ve been healthy. I hit the gym five days a week. It feels good to sweat and see the gains I’m making.
- I’ve made lora of friends. I make an effort to meet people. I take an interest in them. I’ll try to make a friend with anyone who passes my way.
- I’ve enjoyed blogging each day. I have a personal goal of spreading hope and good news wherever I go. Blogging helps me to do that.
- I am tight with my five daughters. We either talk or text every day. I have their back and I know they have my back.
- I have the best neighbors. We care for and watch out for each other.m
- And, I’ve maintained my no quit, never give up attitude throughout the year. If I get down, I get back up and start moving forward again.
Optimism is going to be the topic for the next couple of weeks. Optimism is a great way to close out the year and begin 2024 with confidence that it is going to the be year yet.
Inspiring Quote Showing The Place Where Peace is Found
If there is to be peace in the world,
There must be peace in the nations.
If there is to be peace in the nations,
There must be peace in the cities.
If there is to be peace in the cities,
There must be peace between neighbors.
If there is to be peace between neighbors,
There must be peace in the home.
If there is to be peace in the home,
There must be peace in the heart.
Think About It ~ We can much more together than we can do alone
I can lift a certain amount of weight by myself. When my friend helps me we can lift three times the weight I was able to lift alone. It’s the way life works. We can do much more together than we can do alone. When we work together we discover “our way” will get us much further than “my way” will get us. C’mon reach out a helping hand and work together with family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors. Together, we’ll make it a better world.
A Better Life ~ Is It Time to Connect?
Is it time to broaden your circle of contacts beyond work and friends? What about your neighbors, the folks who life next door or on the same floor? The more we connect with those near us, the more we lose our sense of isolation and develop a sense of connectivity. It’s emotionally and physically healthy to make connections. When we connect we have people to call on when we need a hand. We also have the opportunity to lend a helping hand. From a personal experience as a widower, it has made all the difference for me. I have great neighbors who have my back and I have their back as well.
Mending Wall ~ Robert Frost
Where they have left not one stone on a stone,
But they would have the rabbit out of hiding,
To please the yelping dogs. The gaps I mean,
No one has seen them made or heard them made,
But at spring mending-time we find them there.
I let my neighbor know beyond the hill;
And on a day we meet to walk the line
And set the wall between us once again.
We keep the wall between us as we go.
To each the boulders that have fallen to each.
And some are loaves and some so nearly balls
We have to use a spell to make them balance:
‘Stay where you are until our backs are turned!’
We wear our fingers rough with handling them.
Oh, just another kind of outdoor game,
One on a side. It comes to little more:
There where it is we do not need the wall:
He is all pine and I am apple orchard.
My apple trees will never get across
And eat the cones under his pines, I tell him.
He only says, ‘Good fences make good neighbors.’
Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder
If I could put a notion in his head:
‘Why do they make good neighbors? Isn’t it
Where there are cows? But here there are no cows.
Before I built a wall I’d ask to know
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.
Something there is that doesn’t love a wall,
That wants it down.’ I could say ‘Elves’ to him,
But it’s not elves exactly, and I’d rather
He said it for himself. I see him there
Bringing a stone grasped firmly by the top
In each hand, like an old-stone savage armed.
He moves in darkness as it seems to me,
Not of woods only and the shade of trees.
He will not go behind his father’s saying,
And he likes having thought of it so well
He says again, ‘Good fences make good neighbors.’
Quote by Drake ~ a blessing
May your neighbors respect you, trouble neglect you, angels protect you and heaven accept you
Drake
No Advanced Degree Needed
I want to be like the unnoticed people who cross my path. The quiet, unassuming, kind, responsible, and compassionate people. The man and woman who quietly lend a helping hand, offer a smile, do what they are supposed to do, and take the time to listen. They are the superglue holding us together.
It’s Marsha, one of the cashiers at my market. It doesn’t matter what time of day, what day of the year I go through her line, her smile lights up the sky. She never forgets to say, “How are you doing? I hope your day is a good one.” I leave feeling good and ready to pay it forward.
It’s my neighbors Tina, Andrea, Lucy, Doug, and Fran. There is always time for a hello, and a willingness to step up whenever needed. Don’t have to ask, they know. It’s as if they receive cosmic messages a neighbor needs them. They don’t make excuses. They show up. Sleeves rolled up, Happy to pitch in. Knowing I have neighbors who care brings a rainbow over my home each day.
It’s my Starbucks barista. She knows me by name and my drink, “Venti dark roast, no room for cream, right, Ray?” The unnoticed people abound. They’re everywhere. I imagine you’re one of the unnoticed people. You go about doing your job, being kind, taking time for someone who needs a helping hand. It’s a simple thing. No advanced degree needed. People making other people feel welcome. People pitching in and helping other people – all done without headlines,
It’s a simple thing. No advanced degree needed. People making other people feel welcome. People pitching in and helping other people – all done without headlines, notoriety, or fanfare. It goes unnoticed by everyone except the person on the receiving end who is grateful.
Today, I will be one of the unnoticed people, making all I meet feel welcome and passing along a smile.
The Power of Love
“Only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible.” – Albert Einstein
I am a guy dancing alone. In reality, I’m only alone if I choose to be alone. I am surrounded by great neighbors. I have great friends. I have wonderful daughters and grandchildren. Everywhere I travel I meet good people, kind people, compassionate people.
I am attempting the absurd, as Einstein says – I am proving to myself and to all who share a similar journey, suffering doesn’t have the last word. Love has the last word. Despair has no place in the conversation. Love is the conversation. Sorrow will not triumph. Love will triumph over all.
Yes, believing in the awesome, healing, renewing, recreating power of love is absurd. It is the path I follow to achieve the absurd.
A Place Called Home
“The ache for home lives in all of us. The safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.” Maya Angelu
A few years back, I was traveling with four of my doctoral students to our research site. One of the doctoral students said, “Dr. Calabrese, where do you call home?” He knew my career took me to several states. Without hesitation, I said, “Home is where I am with my wife, the person I love most.” He didn’t understand. He said, “My home is Kansas. I knew he wouldn’t understand what I meant.
I’ve never thought of home as a house or a location. I’ve always thought of it as a place where I am with the person or people I love most in this world.
“Home isn’t where you’re from, it’s where you find light when all grows dark.” ~ Pierce Brown
In that particular place, whether it is a house, car, restaurant, or coffee shop, I am at peace because I know I am loved as I am. I have to be no other than who I am.
Now, nine months since Babe died, I am recreating a home. My five daughters live out of state and here I am in Texas, alone, but not lonely. Together with my neighbors and new friends, I am recreating a place I will call home.
“I don’t care if we have our house, or a cliff ledge, or a cardboard box. Home is wherever we all are, together,” James Patterson
I hope you have a place called home.
