Joe: “My girlfriend demanded I choose between my career as a reporter and her.”
Pete: “What are you going to do?”
Joe: “I have some breaking news for her.”
laughter
Today’s Joke
Joe: “I’m having a problem with my girlfriend. I thinks she’s anorexic.”
Pete: “What are you going to do?”
Joe: “I’m seeing less and less of her.”
Today’s Joke
Joe: “I doing real well with my New Year’s resolution to read more.”
Pete: “What are you reading.”
Joe: “The closed captions on my TV.”
Today’s Health Tip ~ Laughing is Good for Your Heart
It’s well known that laughter can be a valuable coping tool for those suffering from medical conditions. But according to one 2016 study published in The Journal of Epidemiology, it could also directly contribute to a healthier heart. Among male and female study subjects over the age of 65, those who reported laughing daily had drastically lower rates of cardiovascular disease and stroke.
Today’s Joke
Joe: “My ex still misses me.”
Pete: “How can you tell?”
Joe: “Her aim is getting closer.”
Today’s Joke
Joe: “My wife and I went out for wine and cheese and she described the wine as full bodied and imposing with a nutty base, a sharp bite, and a bitter aftertaste.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, ‘Are you describing the wine or your mother?” She didn’t take it well.
Today’s Joke
Joe: “I bought my mother-in-law a chair for her birthday.”
Pete: “That was nice of you, Joe.”
Joe: “Unfortunately my wife wouldn’t let me plug it in.”
Today’s Joke
Joe: “I told my friend Al that my mother-in-law is an angel.”
Pete: “What did Al say?”
Joe: “He said I was lucky, his mother-in-law is still alive.”
Today’s Joke
Joe: “I wanted watch the symphony with my wife and kids, but I had to turn it off before the first movement finished.”
Pete: “Why was that?”
Joe: “Too much sax and violins.”
Today’s Joke
Joe: “My girlfriend told me she could trust me to keep a secret.”
Pete: “Why did she say that?”
Joe: “She said, It doesn’t matter what she says to me sinceI never listen to her.”
