Whenever I travel I see and meet so many wonderful people. On a recent flight, a tall man, lifted luggage out of the overhead bins for several older people. One passenger hollered, “Ma’am, you forgot your scarf. The woman was almost to the front of the plane. We all waited while the scarf was passed forward. A grateful woman took the scarf and said thank you. An elderly woman asked if someone could pass her luggage forward. It had been stored in overhead bin several rows behind her seat. Immediately, someone opened the bin, asked, “is this yours?” She said, “Yes.” The luggage was passed forward. There are many good people and they are the glue that holds it all together. I know you are one of the good people.
feeling good
Feel Good Tip ~ Smile, You’ll Be Happier
There is a Link Between Smiling and Happiness
“It may seem obvious that smiling, the outward expression of happiness, makes us feel happy but what does the science say? The definitive answer came in in 2019 when researchers from the University of Tennessee at Knoxville decided to look back at 138 studies carried out around the world involving more than 11,000 volunteers and covering a period of 50 years.They concluded that our facial expressions do indeed impact our mood and our emotions: frowning makes us feel sadder, scowling makes us feel angrier and smiling makes us happier. As the researchers pointed out this doesn’t mean we can literally smile our way to happiness, but it is evidence that our minds and bodies are intimately linked when we experience emotions. ” Source
NOTE: I don’t see many happy people. I go to the supermarket, few people smile. I sit in a coffee shop and see young people smiling much more than older people. I go to the gym, same thing. When I see someone smiling, it makes me smile. I also notice that when I smile at another, I usually get a smile in return. Smile and remind folks that smiling makes us feel better. You’ll be doing them a favor.
Feeling Good Tip ~ Is Your Work Contributing to Your Happiness?
Is Your Work Contributing to Your Happiness or Your Stress
According to an online article in Time Magazine, “Karl Pillemer of Cornell University interviewed nearly 1500 people age 70 to 100+ for his book “30 Lessons for Living: Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans.” What piece of advice were they more adamant about than any other? More adamant about than lessons regarding marriage, children and happiness? Don’t stay in a job you dislike.
NOTE: There are aspects of every job that are unpleasant. There are aspects of every job that are enjoyable. When the negative aspects outweigh the positive aspects you’ll never be happy in that job. If the positive aspects outweigh the negative aspects you’re in a good place. When I was in academia I found the most posiitive parts of my work were teaching, meeting with students, and the creative aspects of my work (writing, lunches with like minded colleagues, etc.). These positive aspects far outweighed the negative aspects of academic life (endless meetings, colleagues who enjoyed arguing as much as breathing). Take stock of your work. Which aspect of your work has the greater weight: the positive or the negative.
Feeling Good Tip ~ Happy People are Not Bored
Boredom is a Burden
According to the Time Magazine article “6 Secrets You Can Learn from the Happiest People on Earth,” The happiest people are those that are very busy but don’t feel rushed: . . . Too much time is a burden: . . . surveys “continue to show the least happy group to be those who quite often have excess time.” Boredom, it seems, is burdensome. So what do you need to be doing? Things you’re good at. “Signature strengths” are the things you are uniquely talented at — and using them brings you joy. People who deliberately exercised their signature strengths on a daily basis became significantly happier for months.
NOTE: Jump into life with two feet. My mom lived into her 80″s and she was never bored. She worked in a shoe factory until she was 82. And, she loved to bake cookies. She baked them for family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors. Baking cookies was her signature strength. She wasn’t educated in the formal sense, but she knew that it was healthier to stay busy than be bored.
Feeling Good Tip ~ A Simple Way to be Happier
Being Happy – It’s Really Simple
In a Time Magazine article, “6 Secrets You Can Learn from the Happiest People on Earth” the authors cite a 70 year longitudinal study of Harvard University men. The study which followed men all their adult lives is known as the Grant Study or Harvard study. It found that “the capacity to love and be loved was the single strength most clearly associated with subjective well-being at age eighty.”
NOTE: It’s easy to confuse texting, emailing, or Zoom with close contact, especially with those we love. While those digital methods keep us in touch in our mobile society, they can’t replace the importance of connecting at a person to person level. A welcoming hug or kiss can’t be replaced by an emoji. Love transcends all. Love is the single most important healing agent we all have. The deepest wounds give way to love’s healing touch. Love Always.
Feeling Good Tip of the Day
What is Happiness?
According to an article on Science of People, “Happiness is a harmonious state of being, according to the Journal of Happiness Studies, where researchers investigated happiness culturally and historically.”
The article suggests that we discover happiness under four conditions:
- When we feel content or satisfied.
- When we are the agent of our own happiness.
- When we focus on inner enrichment over material satisfaction.
- When we maintain a positive outlook on the future.
It seems to me that we have a high degree of control over whether or not we experience happiness. Is it time to do a personal review of your lifestyle and see what adjustments you can make to increase your degree of happiness?
Feeling Good Tip
When You Don’t Have an Answer, Listen
Yesterday I ran into a guy I know at the gym. This guy has biceps as big as my legs. When I looked at him he looked as if the weight of the world was on his shoulders and he was about to collapse from carrying it. I asked him how he was doing. He stopped and looked at me and said, “Terrible, Ray. Last night at dinner, out of the blue, my told me she was going to divorce me.” For a moment, I thought this big, strong guy was going to fall to pieces. He held it together. He talked and I listened. Sometimes we can’t help others to feel good, the best we can do is to listen. I think that is good enough. Maybe, as he went through his day, he’ll remember that somebody listened.
Feeling Good Tip
Are You Prepared for the Stormy Season?
I’m sitting at my desk at 7:45 a.m. and across the way workers are putting a new roof on a neighbor’s home. The roofers got an early start because the high today will be 103 F (39.44 C). The neighbors are taking steps to replace a worn roof before the stormy season hits. It’s the same way with us. We don’t know when our stormy season will hit, but it will. We can take steps to ensure that we are strong, resilient and ready to handle any challenge. We can rate ourselves on the following scale from 1 to 5. One being low, 5 being high.
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- How strong are my family and friendship connections.? 1 2 3 4 5
- Am I eating healthy? 1 2 3 4 5
- Am I taking time each day to relax and quiet my mind? 1 2 3 4 5
- Am I getting 150 minutes a week of exercise? 1 2 3 4 5
- How strong is my spiritual life? 1 2 3 4 5
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When you finish review your scores, you’ll know where to improve to meet the challenges of your stormy season.
Feeling Good Tip
Is It Time to Stop Manufacturing Challenges?
Every species on our wonderful planet has to daily prove it is hardier than the challenges it faces. It’s the way it is. We can’t manufacture a challenge-less life. Sometimes, we go out of our way to create challenges that don’t have a right to exist. For example, we ‘tell someone off.’ We buy too much on credit. We indulge ourselves in unhealthy practices. The list goes on. We can feel a lot better if we stop creating challenges for ourselves and focus solely on the challenges that are part of living. When facing life’s challenges, never quit. Never give up. Always stay strong.
Feeling Good Tip
Feeling Stressed From Going All Out?
I watched a great video where the speaker (a professor at Berkeley) spoke of the science of weight training and how to lift for endurance or strength. He said that one should lift between 30% and 80% of their maximum load. The closer to 80% the more the strength gains. The range between 30% and 50% took care of maintaining muscle and building endurance. What if we applied the same principle to our everyday lives. We don’t have to go 100% to achieve maximum results. We can scale back and achieve optimum results and simultaneously reduce our stress levels. Are you running at 100%? Try scaling back by easing your foot off the acceleration pedal. You’ll feel better.
