relationships

Thinking Out Loud ~ Is it Really Normal?

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I am reading “We Should All be Feminists” by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Ms. Adichie is a well-known Nigeran author who Time Magazine named as one of the one hundred most influential people in the world in 2015. Her book, “We Should All be Feminists” was taken from a Ted Talk and initiated a global conversation about feminism. Hope you enjoy the snippets I share with you from her book and my reflections on them.

In her book, We Should All be Feminists, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie writes, “If we do something over and over it becomes normal period if we see the same thing over and over, it becomes normal.” Pg. 12

NOTE: I’d like to add, “If we hear something over and over, we begin to believe it’s true. When I was a young kid, one of my chores was to mow the lawn. There was one way to mow the lawn, my dad’s way. I found myself, years later, mowing the lawn in the same way until I decided it was okay to mow it a different way. When I did, I wasn’t struck by lightning. I didn’t have a coronary. And the sun continued to rise and set right on schedule. Unless we question why we’re doing something over and over we may miss out on a better way to do it.

Feel Good Tip of the Day ~ Sometimes it’s Better to Roll With It

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It’s tough to be quiet when you think the other person is wrong or nuts. It’s easy to argue with this person and attempt to put him/her in his/her place. No matter the “rightness” of your argument, you lose if your attempt is the change the way the other person thinks. You see this played out on all the political talk shows. It doesn’t matter which perspective they promote, they’re right in their minds. If you want to feel better, roll with it. You don’t have to agree. You can ask questions in a gentle way that may help them reflect on their position. In any event, you will not lose a friend because of an argument over political issues. And, you’ll sleep better.

Feel Good Tip of the Day ~ Is It Time to Mind Your Own Business?

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One of the best ways to have a peaceful spirit and feel happy is to stay out of other people’s business. Sometimes it’s hard to do especially when they are the people we love. They, like us, have a right to live their life the way they choose to live it without our interference. You may feel some angst by not saying what you feel, in the end you will retain friendships. It’s worth it. You’ll feel peaceful and happy, and you won’t cause others to be unhappy..

Feel Good Tip of the Day ~ We All Make Mistakes

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We all make mistakes. It’s part of the human condition. There’s no way we can undo something we’ve already done or said. It’s why forgiveness is so important to every relationship. It’s important for us to forgive; and, equally important to be forgiven. That’s the tough stuff in relationship building. I knew a guy who divorced after 25 years. He claimed that working at a relationship is too hard. I felt sorry for him. Last I knew he lived alone with his dog. It takes courage to work through the messy stuff and forgive. It takes more courage to learn from the events and use the learning to build a better relationship.

Photo for Today ~ You are Loved

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Positive Thought for Today ~ It’s the Little Things that Matter

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Let the little things slide and your relationship will instantly improve. Be quick to forgive those who love you, you’ll tie the relationship binds tighter.

You’ll soon discover your life overflows with love.

Positive Thought for Today ~ Cooperation Works

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We’re either working together or working against. If I were to place a bet on which team gets to the finish line first, I’d place my money on the team that is working together. When we set aside our differences and discover what we share in common we create a positive environment. It’s true in the work environment and in personal relationships.

Feeling Good Tip for Today ~ Put a Leash on the Tongue

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The relationships we create are our connection to humanity. Our relationships are treasures to be be guarded. Especially the relationships that are close to us. Don’t say today that tomorrow you’ll regret you said it. When anger grabs hold of our tongue, nothing good can come from it. It’s difficult to restrain our emotions in a heated moment. I’ve witnessed families splitting because of angry words. I’ve witnessed good friends turning their backs on each other and never speaking again. All because of words spoken in a heated moment. In most cases, it was something that could have been worked through. The relationship is far more important than a momentary vent of emotions.

Positive Thought for the Day ~ Listening is Hard Work but Worth It

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“We do not hear what we hear…, only what we remember.”

Morton Feldman
NOTE: Listening is hard work. Making sure we listen accurately takes even more effort. Those in great relationships make the effort to accurately hear each other. When we hear selectively we filter what we hear through our biases. Selective hearing is often the source of many disagreements. Make the effort to listen and listen accurately it will pay off big time.

Photo of the Day ~ Giving Ourselves to Another

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Life Take on Greater Meaning

When we give ourselves

to someone

Knowing he/she needs us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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