Joe: “My girlfriend said my mom spoiled me.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, ‘All the guys smell this way.'”
One-Liners
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Car Has Problems
Joe: “My car failed the emissions test today.”
Pete: “What are you going to do?”
Joe: “I’m fuming.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Decides it’s Time to Breakup
Joe: “My girlfriend is breaking with me because I refuse to remove the coffee filter from the coffee machine after breakfast.”
Pete: “There’s got to be more?”
Joe: “No. She said it was grounds for leaving.”
Today’s Joke: Someone Stole Joe’s Coffee Cup
Joe: “Someone went into my office and stole my favorite coffee cup.”
Pete: “What are you going to do about it?”
Joe: “I’m going to the police station and ask them if I can look at mug shots.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Grandma is Mostly Irish
Joe: “My Grandma is 80% Irish.”
Pete: “That’s so?”
Joe: “Yah, that’s her parents named her Iris.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Tries Hard to Impress
Joe: “I took my car in for service today.”
Pete: “How did it go?”
Joe: “The pastor wasn’t happy.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Accuses His GF of Making a Snap Judgement
Joe: “My new girlfriend told me I was terrible in bed.”
Pete: “How did that make you feel?”
Joe: “I told her that making judgements on 60 seconds of data was unfair.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF is Splitting
Joe: “My girlfriend broke up with me. She said I was too passive and don’t stand up for myself.”
Pete: “Did you say anything to her?”
Joe: “Yah. I said, “You’re right about that.”
Today’s Joke: Joe is Always Helpful
Joe: “My girlfriend told me she wanted peace and quiet while she cooked dinner.”
Pete: “Was that a problem?”
Joe: “No, I took the battery out of the smoke detector.”
Today’s Joke: Is Joe a Cheapskate?
Joe: “My girlfriend and I had an argument. She claimed I was a cheapskate.”
Pete: “How did you respond to her?”
Joe: “I told her I’m not buying her argument.”
