Joe: “I went to Starbucks and ordered a coffee without cream.”
Pete: “Did they get your order right?”
Joe: ‘Not quite. The barista said, ‘We’re out of cream, how about no milk?'”
comedy
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Into Astronomy
Joe: “Do you like Orion’s Belt?”
Pete: “I guess.”
Joe: “I give it three stars.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Gives Him Advice
Joe: “This morning, over breakfast with my girlfriend, I was telling her about my talk today. She gave me some advice.”
Pete: “What did she say?”
Joe: “She said, ‘Don’t try to be charming, intelligent, or witty. Just be yourself.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Dream Comes True
Joe: “My dream has finally come true. I was accepted at Harvard.”
Pete: “Do you know how many applied?”
Joe: “Yah, I was selected out of 100 to be a janitor.”
Today’s Joke: Joe is a Natural
Joe: “I used to play piano by ear.”
Pete: “You must be a natural.”
Joe: “Now I use my hands.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Asks Joe a Question
Joe: “My girlfriend asked me if I heard of Pavlov.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “It rings a bell.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Has a New Job
Joe: “Tomorrow I start my new job as a garbage collector. But they didn’t give me any training.”
Pete: “What will you do?”
Joe: “The boss said not to worry, I’ll pick it up as I go.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Didn’t Quite Get the Directions Right
Joe: “My warehouse foreman gave me a roll of bubble wrap and told me to pop it in corner.”
Pete: “That seems like an easy job.
Joe: “It took me a half of a day.
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Has an Opinion
Joe: “My girlfriend says making love while on vacation is the best.”
Pete: “It must be because you’re so relaxed.”
Joe: “I wish she didn’t tell me by text message.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Had a Close Call
Joe: “My girlfriend got stung by a bee on the forehead. She’s at the ER now, her face all swollen and bruised, she almost died.”
Pete: “That was a close call.”
Joe: ” Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.
