Balance is important in life. We can’t ride a bicycle without it. When we’re in balance our emotions compensate for each other. We more easily find that space where we feel peaceful. Are you out of balance? Is one area of your life overwhelming all the other areas? It may be time to bring things back into balance.
The road to optimism starts with small steps, or small joys. “We build confidence and change our expectations for the future with tiny, frequent wins,” says Heft. Whether you planted pretty mums in a container to brighten your front steps or you checked off a task on your to-do list, don’t just brush these small accomplishments aside, acknowledge them. While pessimists tend to believe their fate is out of their control, optimists think that with hard work, the future is largely in their hands.
We can call the small steps confidence builders. When we take small steps to become more optimistic we quickly discover we’re smiling more, enjoying life more, and lot more fun for others to hang out with.
Song of a Dream
Sarojini Naidu
Once in the dream of a night I stood
Lone in the light of a magical wood,
Soul-deep in visions that poppy-like sprang;
And spirits of Truth were the birds that sang,
And spirits of Love were the stars that glowed,
And spirits of Peace were the streams that flowed
In that magical wood in the land of sleep.
“The most important opinion you’ll ever have is the one you hold of yourself.”
When you have resilience, you harness the inner strength that helps you rebound from a setback or challenge, such as a job loss, an illness, a disaster or a loved one’s death. If you lack resilience, you might dwell on problems, feel victimized, become overwhelmed or turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as substance abuse, eating disorders or risky behaviors. Resilience won’t make your problems go away — but resilience can give you the ability to see past them, find enjoyment in life and better handle stress. If you aren’t as resilient as you’d like to be, you can develop and learn skills to become more resilient. Resilience can help protect you from various mental health conditions, such as depression and anxiety. Resilience can also help offset factors that increase the risk of mental health conditions, such as being bullied or previous trauma. If you have an existing mental health condition, being resilient can improve your coping ability.
Joe: “I had a job interview and was ask if I could handle a variety of tasks.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, ‘Of course, I’ve had 8 different jobs in the last four months.”
“It’s recognizing that when we feel hungry, particularly after we’ve been eating to capacity for a period of time, that our hunger signals might not be calibrated in the [usual] way,” Dr Fiona Willer says. To put this into practice, she says you need to envision what an “enjoyable” day of eating would look like for you, including nutritional foods that make you feel energized, and eat like this for a few days.
Dr Willer says it’s important to include “core foods”, which are essentially less-processed food items that are high in nutrients. These include meats, seafood, vegetables, fruits, grains and dairy. “The body needs the core foods to function properly … and if you’re eating a lot of non-core foods, you don’t have room in your day for [nutritional meals],” she says.
“The strangest secret in the world is that you become what you think about (Earl Nightingale).”
Lots of times thoughts just pop in my head. Other times, I can think about a problem and not let it go until I have figured out how to resolve it. These are things that are normal. Between these two types of thinking there is a lot of space to think about things. If I’m thinking about how to accomplish my dreams, about how I can become a better a better person, or how I can contribute to my church and community, my mind is in a good space. If I let my mind ruminate on negative past experiences or regrets, situations that make me angry, or ways to get even, I’m wallowing in the mud. Better to soar among the stars and let our minds play with thoughts that elevate us.
With realistic optimism, you don’t just expect the best and hope that things will go well. Nor do you let yourself see and expect only the worst. Instead, you look at the “big picture,” the good and the bad. You then:
For example, let’s say you are about to have a knee surgery. You can choose to be optimistic about your recovery, rather than let fear or hopelessness take hold. Imagine how you want to feel 6 or 12 months after surgery—strong and active. Picture what you want to be doing, how you want to be moving around. Keep these positive, hopeful pictures in your mind.
Note: I had both hips replaced in 2022. My left hip was replaced two and half months ago. I practiced realistic optimism, worked hard in my pre hab and post hab exercises. I am back to full strength and full activity and have been for over a month. Optimism worked for me to get me back to the gym and being physically active. It can work for you as well.
“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.”
