I can give things for Christmas, and I do. Things are important, not so much for the thing I give, but for the symbolism of the giving. When I give a gift it symbolizes that the person receiving the gift is important to me. Receiving a gift is much more important than the giving. If I focus on the thing I get as a gift, chances are I’ll be disappointed. It doesn’t fit. I don’t like the color. I don’t need this, etc. That may all be true. Another way to look at is, for each gift we receive, someone took the time to think of us. Being thought of is a powerful action. It means that I see you and I want to share something with you. It is a recognition of our deeper human connection. On Christmas day when I am with my family and I open a gift and feel my daughter and her family looking me, I’ll say as I open it, “Ah, I love it, a sweatshirt with a large dinosaur on front and its tail on the shirt’s back. It’s what I’ve always wanted.” I’ll slip the sweatshirt on, it may be the only time I wear it. Merry Christmas. Spread the joy and love and peace.
Relationship
It’s All a Gift
A few things to never take for granted: One’s life. A partner’s love. Good health. A faithful friend. Any meal. A bird’s song. Springtime. And, a hot cup of coffee. Everything is a gift.
A Time to Talk ~ A Poem by Robert Frost
A Time to Talk
Robert Frost
When a friend calls to me from the road
And slows his horse to a meaning walk,
I don’t stand still and look around
On all the hills I haven’t hoed,
And shout from where I am, What is it?
No, not as there is a time to talk.
I thrust my hoe in the mellow ground,
Blade-end up and five feet tall,
And plod: I go up to the stone wall
For a friendly visit.
Happiness is Like a Kiss
There’s an old song sung by Ella Fitzgerald and Louie Armstrong titled, It Takes Two to Tango. The chorus lyrics read: “Takes two to tango, two to tango / Two to really get the feeling of romance / Let’s do the tango, do the tango / Do the dance of love.” That’s the way it is with happiness. Our happiness increases in direct proportion to the number of people with whom we can share it and who reciprocate it with us. Think about going to a ball game alone. Your team wins an exciting game. The people around you are sharing their joy with their friends, It’s not quite the same as when you have someone with you to share the joy of victory. When I passed my dissertation defense on my way to my doctorate, I called my wife as soon as I got out of the defense meeting. She screamed with joy. We were sharing a happiness moment. Bernard Meltzer had it right when he wrote, “Happiness is like a kiss. You must share it to enjoy it.”
We Are Part of the Fabric of the Human Community
We do not live isolated lives. We live in a community. We depend on each other. Think of how much you will depend on others as you drive today. You are counting on every driver who shares the road with you to drive carefully. Our dependence exists on the micro and macro levels. We are a part of the woven fabric of life where what we do affects other people. When we bring to the forefront of our minds that we are integral part of the human community we begin to see how dependent we are on each other. Discover creative ways to dialogue, cooperate, and seek common ground.
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Awareness and Making a Difference
Have you ever misplaced a wallet, smart phone, or keys? I have. We usually don’t recognize they’re missing until they’re missing and then we don’t have them. We retrace our steps through our home without luck. It’s as if they decided to take a break and go to Starbucks for a coffee without telling us. Our anxiety increases, we search our home again. No luck. We look in places where we already know the answer. Finally, we see the object we were hunting. It was in plain sight all the time. We walked by it at least ten times. The same thing happens all the time in life. We are not aware of what is going on around us. When we are aware of what is going on around us we can make a difference in that moment. Awareness gives us an opportunity to lighten someone’s burden, encourage someone, give an appropriate hug to a person who is experiencing a loss. We can do so much good when we are aware.
Between us Now ~ A Poem by Thomas Hardy
Between Us Now
Thomas Hardy
Between us now and here—
Two thrown together
Who are not wont to wear
Life’s flushest feather—
Who see the scenes slide past,
The daytimes dimming fast,
Let there be truth at last,
Even if despair.
So thoroughly and long
Have you now known me,
So real in faith and strong
Have I now shown me,
That nothing needs disguise
Further in any wise,
Or asks or justifies
A guarded tongue.
Face unto face, then, say,
Eyes my own meeting,
Is your heart far away,
Or with mine beating?
When false things are brought low,
And swift things have grown slow,
Feigning like froth shall go,
Faith be for aye.
Health Facts: Loving Relationships Improve Health
Here are three ways a loving relationship can positively impact health:
- Reduced Stress and Lower Blood Pressure: Being in a loving, supportive relationship can decrease stress levels by boosting the production of oxytocin, sometimes called the “love hormone.” Oxytocin helps reduce stress and lower blood pressure, supporting heart health.
- Better Immune Function: Loving relationships often lead to a sense of security and lower levels of cortisol, the stress hormone, which in high levels can weaken the immune system. Reduced cortisol allows the immune system to function more effectively, making individuals less susceptible to infections and inflammation-related illnesses.
- Increased Motivation for Healthy Habits: In loving relationships, partners often encourage each other to maintain healthy habits, like regular exercise, balanced eating, and routine health check-ups. This mutual support and accountability can make it easier to stick to healthy lifestyle choices.
These benefits highlight how meaningful connections impact both emotional and physical well-being.
Source: ChatGPT
Health Facts: 4 Best Practices for Maintaining Healthy Relationships
Here are four best practices for maintaining healthy relationships:
- Open and Honest Communication: Regularly express your feelings, thoughts, and concerns in a respectful manner. Clear communication helps to avoid misunderstandings and fosters trust and understanding.
- Active Listening: Give your full attention to the other person when they are speaking. Acknowledge their emotions, validate their perspective, and show empathy. This builds deeper connections and shows that you value their input.
- Mutual Respect and Boundaries: Understand and respect each other’s boundaries, both emotional and physical. Mutual respect helps create a sense of safety and trust in the relationship.
- Quality Time Together: Spending meaningful time together strengthens your bond. Make an effort to engage in activities that both of you enjoy, while also making time for deep conversations that allow the relationship to grow.
Focusing on these can help create a strong, healthy, and fulfilling relationship.
Today’s Thought: Relationships that Work
There’s a common theme among those with great relationships. Each person in the relationship understands the relationship is about the relationship. There is sacrifice by both parties to further what’s best for the relationship. When a party to the relationship sacrifices, there’s no quid pro quo asked. The sacrifice is done because it is the right thing to do to advance the relationship. Often, the sacrifices are small, sometimes, the sacrifices are huge. In reality, each time a party to the relationship sacrifices, he/she is giving the other a gift. There’s no keeping score, because there is no need to keep score. We do it for each other because we love each other and our relationship is the sum of the both of us working together to make it a great and lasting relationship.
