Joe: “As soon as I rolled out of bed I knew it was going to be a bad day.”
Pete: “How so?”
Joe: “I had a tough time getting up off the floor.”
One-Liners
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Girlfriend Broke Up With Him
Joe: “My girlfriend broke up with me because I was constipated.”
Pete: “Did she give you a reason?”
Joe: “She told me I was so full of it.”
Today’s Joke ~ Joe’s Girlfriend Believes Joe Has an Iron Deficiency
Joe: “My girlfriend told me she thinks I have an iron deficiency.”
Pete: “What evidence does she have for saying that?”
Joe: “She said I always have wrinkled shirts.”
Today’s Joke ~ Joe’s Girlfriend Got a New Tattoo
Joe: “My girlfriend is a drummer in a rock band. She got a new tattoo.”
Pete: “What kind of tattoo?”
Joe: “I’m not sure, but she said it was cymbalic.
Today’s Joke – Joe Visits His Psychologist
Joe: “I saw my psychologist today and told him I was addicted to Twitter.”
Pete: “What did your psychologist say?”
Joe: “My psychologist looked at me and said, ‘I don’t follow you.'”
Today’s Joke ~ Joe Makes a Joke About Getting an X-Ray
Joe: “I went in the hospital for an x-ray and asked why it was taking so long to get one.”
Pete: “What did they say?”
Joe: “They said they had a skeleton staff.”
Today’s Joke ~ A Clean Joke to Make You Laugh
Laugh Along With Joe & Pete
Joe: “My dad wanted to retire from his job as a traffic cop.”
Pete: “Did he?”
Joe: His supervisor gave him the green light.
Today’s Joke ~ Start Your Day With Humor
Laugh Along with Joe & Pete
Joe: “My psychologist told me I had a gambling addiction.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, ‘How much do you want to bet on that?”
Joke of the Day ~ Start Your Day With Humor
Laugh Along With Joe & Pete
Joe: “My girlfriend, who is deaf, broke up with me.”
Pete: “Did you see it coming?”
Joe: “No, I couldn’t read the signs.”
Today’s Joke ~ Start Your Day With Humor
Laugh Along With Joe & Pete
Joe: “I was flirting with the woman at the airport check-in counter.”
Pete: “How did it go?”
Joe: “She told me I had too much baggage.”
