Joe: “I was raised as an only child.”
Pete: “How do you feel about that?”
Joe: “I’m okay with it, but it really annoyed my brother.”
clean jokes
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I asked my Norwegian friend if he had a good summer.”
Pete: “What did he say?”
Joe: “He said, ‘No, I was working that day.'”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I came home and found my wife kissing another man. I asked her what’s going on.”
Pete: “What did she say?”
Joe: “She looked at the guy she was kissing and said, “See, I told you he was stupid.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I think I’m getting old, my wife ask me to run upstairs and make love to her.”
Pete: “What makes you think you’re getting old?”
Joe: “I told her I can’t do both.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I went car shopping, saw one I liked, and asked the salesman the sticker price.”
Pete: “What did he say?”
Joe: “He said $200. I said, ‘that’s cheap.’ He said, ‘That’s for the sticker, the car is extra.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “We buried my mom in a dress my wife gave her two years ago.”
Pete: “She must have liked the dress.”
Joe: “When my mom got the dress she said, ‘That’s the last thing I’ll wear.'”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “My wife came home from the store with five cases of beer and a loaf of bread.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I asked if she was expecting company with all the bread she bought.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list.”
Pete: “Good idea to keep a list, Joe. Is it working out?”
Joe: “Not really, I can’t read it now.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I’m getting older and I need glasses.”
Pete: “That’s part of life, Joe.”
Joe: “I’m talking about glasses of beer. Glasses of wine.”
Today’s Smile
Joe: “I got laid off yesterday.”
Pete: “That’s rough.”
Joe: “I’ve got a silver lining. The news said there’s 1500 jobs in jeopardy. I’m moving there tomorrow.
