Comedy fun

Joe: “My boss thinks what I have to say is important.”

Pete: “Did your boss tell you that?”

Joe: “Yes, I called him and my boss said, “Your message is important, please wait for the beep before recording.”

Joe: “I asked my girlfriend to do something that makes her think I’m sexy.”

Pete: “What did she do?”

Joe: “She went out and got drunk.”

Joe: “I went to a bar and I asked the woman next to me if she said, “Would you like to dance?”

Pete: “What did she say?”

Joe: “She said, ‘No, I said, you fat in those pants.'”

Joe: “My girlfriend told me our relationship is a lot like algebra.”

Pete: “How so, Joe?”

Joe: “She said, she thinks about her X and looks at me and wonders Y.”

Joe: “My boss fired me, this afternoon.”

Pete: “Why’d your boss do that?”

Joe: “When my boss stepped into my office, I said, “If you’re here, who’s running hell/””

Joe: “I met this woman at a bar and I told her, ‘I want to give myself to you.'”

Pete: “What did she say?”

Joe: “She said, ‘I don’t accept cheap gifts.'”

Source

Joe: “Charging cables walked into a bar and asked for a beer.”

Pete: “What did the bartender say?”

Joe: “The bartender said, ‘I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.'”

Joe: “I wrote a song last night about tortillas.”

Pete: “That’s great, Joe. What is the melody?”

Joe: “It’s a rap.”

Source

Joe: “My boss asked me if I knew the difference between apathy and ignorance.”

Pete: “What did you say?”

Joe: “I told my boss, ‘I don’t know and I don’t care.'”

Joe: “My girlfriend and I named our dog Egypt.”

Pete: “How did you choose that name.”

Joe: “Easy. He leaves a pyramid in a every room.”