Joe: “I quit my low carb diet.”
Pete: “Why’s that, Joe?”
Joe: “It goes against the grain.”
Joe: “I keep taking my girlfriend everywhere.”
Pete: “That’s nice, Joe.”
Joe: “Problem is she keeps finding her way back.”
Joe: “My girlfriend tells me I don’t have any sense of direction.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I told her I don’t have any idea where she is coming from.”
Joe: “I didn’t sleep well. I am so tired.”
Pete: “How tired are you?”
Joe: “I’m so tired, my tired is tired.”
Joe: “My supervisor asked me to put a joke on the first slide of the presentation.”
Pete: “How did it work out?”
Joe: “Apparently a picture of my pay check wasn’t funny.”
Joe: “I enjoy like having a conversation with my young nephew much more than with most adults.”
Pete: “How so, Joe?”
Joe: “Most adults will never ask me what is my favorite snake.”
Joe: “I was visited my grandpa and he was talking to a young bearded guy with lots of bling and tattoos. I said, ‘Who is this guy?'”
Pete: “What did your grandpa say?”
Joe: “He said, “‘This is my hip replacement.'”
Joe: “When my mom was in labor, my head got stuck in her and midwife had to pull me out”
Pete: “Did it all turn out okay?”
Joe: “Yah, I got so excited, I couldn’t wait to see my new brother.”
Joe: “I finally did my laundry last night.”
Pete: “How did it go?”
Joe: “It’s a load off my mind.”
Joe: “My wife was in labor and I was holding her hand. I told her I was sorry for her pain.”
Pete: “What did she say?”
Joe: “She said, don’t worry Joe it’s not your fault.”
