I consider myself blessed. I had a wonderful mom. I remember the walks down the railroad tracks to my uncle’s house three miles away. We’d stop on the way and pick wild grapes and wild blackberries on the way to his house and the way home. When she cooked the macaroni for Sunday dinner, she’d always call me in from the pallor to test if the mostaccioli were done; of course they were. And, she’d always put a bit of her homemade sauce on it. I have lots of good memories about my mom and they all make me smile. Heaven got a good one when she went home.
memories
Episode 27: In My Grieving Journal I Share Some Good Memories
In Episode 27 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I recall some good memories I had with Babe about the seemingly insignificant things Iwere a big deal to her. Recalling these moments brought a smile to my face. I must be making progress. I’m recalling good memories and smiling.
Feeling Good Tip of the Day ~ Discover the Good in Your Life
“If you’re struggling to find joy, there’s one simple yet powerful thing that can help: digging for joy. “Take a moment once a day to recognize the things that are good in your life. At the moment I’m calling it ‘having a dig for joy’ to find the little moments that make us happy in our day,” . . . These little moments can help to buffer against stress and anxiety. It’s a simple practice to do even on terrible days.” Source
NOTE: Instead of asking or thinking about ‘what’s wrong’ try asking and thinking about ‘what’s right or good.’ For each moment in your life you conjure up something wrong, with a bit of effort you’ll discover ten moments where something good happened. These are the times where it all came together and turned out right. You’ll feel a lot better.
Positive Thought of the Day ~ Remember the Good Times
“Write your Sad times in Sand,
Write your Good times in Stone.”
NOTE: What wonderful advice from George Bernard Shaw. When we let our sad moments disappear like the morning dew we create room tor our memories of good times to rise to the top. These are the memories that are our reservoir of strength to navigate our way through life.
Let Your Mom Know She Blessed You
What if I wrote a letter to my mom (living or deceased) and recounted all the ways she blessed me? If you take time to do this for your mom or someone else you dearly loved, you will find it rewarding, You’ll rekindle special memories of good times, love, and kindness. Moreover, if this person is alive, give them the letter. It will make their day. In many ways, a handwritten letter is felt more deeply than an email or typed letter. It shows that the writer took special care to compose the letter.
What If . . .
What if I chose to take today one moment at a time what will I do about planning ahead? I think I’ll keep one eye on the present moment and the other eye looking ahead for a rainbow. That way we can keep a balance between living too much into tomorrow or too much into the moment. It’s a delicate balance. It’s more like a dance where each partner anticipates the moves of the other. There’s no looking back, take the memories that help or heal, discard the rest and dance on.
Today’s Power Thought ~ Which Memories Fill Your Mind?
We all have both positive and negative memories . Which type of memories fill your mind? Give power to the positive memories and turn the negative memories into something positive. As I view my past, there are some experiences I would prefer not to have had. Yet, when I look at the experiences, I see how they shaped me and shaped the journey I traveled. I didn’t like the experiences at the time; today I am grateful for them.
A Better Life ~ Treasure the Good Memories
Only memories lie behind us. Whatever memories you have, discard the painful memories, treasure the good memories. The good memories, those of love, good times, successes, give us confidence that future will be friendly to us.
Sleep Hack: Get the ZZZZ’s to Remember
Not only, for example, do “you need sleep after learning to essentially hit the save button on those new memories so that you don’t forget,” you also “need sleep before learning to actually prepare your brain, almost like a dry sponge ready to initially soak up new information.”
Source
Grieving is Tough, I Was Becoming Stronger
M told me she could see me becoming stronger each day. She asked me to write four letters to Babe. I was to write each letter in the present tense as if Babe were still alive. I frequently paused while I wrote these letters to compose myself. It was a very emotional experience, but, it was a liberating experience that strengthened my will to go on. Here is an excerpt from my love letter to Babe in Dancing Alone: Learning to Live Again:
“Dear Babe,
You’re my first thought when I awaken and the last thought before I fall asleep. When I awaken in the middle of the night and I whisper, “Babe, I love you. I’ll love you forever.” Did you know, I trace the sign of the cross on your shoulder while you are sleeping? I do it every time I wake up in the night. When I trace it, I ask God to bless you and watch over you. The first words you utter after you open your eyes are, “I love you, Bun.” I touch you and say, “I love you, too.”
Each day, your joy of life lights a fire within me. When you open your eyes and turn to me in bed, I see the sparks of joy, life, and love. I know in that moment all is right, all is good, and it will be a great day. You ignite the flames of love, hope, and joy within me. You teach me to lighten up, have fun, and enjoy life’s gifts. “It’s not all serious and it’s not all work,” you tell me.”
Ordering information for the paperback or ebook version of Dancing Alone: Learning to Live Again may be found at https://optimisticbeacon.com/dancing-alone/
Excerpt From: Dancing Alone: Learning to Live Again by Ray Calabrese. This material is protected by copyright
