Joe: “My girlfriend told me that sometimes I violate her personal space.”
Pete: “Why did she say that?”
Joe: “I don’t know. It completely ruined our bubble bath.
one-liners
Today’s Joke: Joe Joined a Support Group
Joe: “I’ve joined a support group for impatient people.”
Pete: “Good for you, Joe.”
Joe: “I can’t wait for our next meeting.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Called the Paranoia Hotline
Joe: “I was having problems last night and called the paranoia hotline.”
Pete: “What did they say?”
Joe: “They said, “How did you get this number?”
Today’s Joke: Joe Had His Car Waxed
Joe: “I just had my car waxed.”
Pete: “How does it look?”
Joe: “I had no idea it could get so hairy.”
Today’s Joke: Will Joe Take the Advice?
Joe: “My psychologist told me I can conquer my fear of buffets.”
Pete: “What did your psychologist tell you to do?”
Joe: “he said the first thing I had to do was to help myselfl.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Happy with His New Running Shoes
Joe: “I love my new orthodontic running shoes.”
Pete: “I think you mean orthopedic running shoes.”
Joe: “I stand corrected.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF is seeking Professional Help
Joe: “My girlfriend has been meditating for six months. Now she has to seeking professional help.”
Pete: “What’s wrong.”
Joe: “She’s been stuck in the present moment for five months.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Doesn’t Know the Answer to His GF’s Question
Joe: “My girlfriend asked if I knew why it a million sperm to fertilize one egg.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I shrugged my shoulders and she said, “They never ask for directions.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Having a Conversation With the Most Important Person in His Life
Joe: “I told my girlfriend it is statistically proven people who talk to themselves are more intelligent and intuitive. She thought it was interesting”
Pete: “What did you say to her?”
Joe: “I said, “I wasn’t talking to you.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Visits His Dad in the Hospital
Joe: “I went to hospital to visit my dad and saw the nurse coming out of his room.”
Pete: “Did you ask her about your dad?
Joe: “Yah, she said she just took his temperature with her rectal thermometer. She reached in her pocket to show me his temperature and pulled out a pen. She added, “Your dad has my pen.””
