Joe: “My buddy Phillip had his lower lip removed last week.”
Pete: That’s horrible.”
Joe: “Yah. We now call him Phil.”
joke
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Has an Opinion
Joe: “My girlfriend says making love while on vacation is the best.”
Pete: “It must be because you’re so relaxed.”
Joe: “I wish she didn’t tell me by text message.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Boss Wants Joe’s Constructive Criticism. What Could Go Wrong?
Joe: “My boss said, ‘I’m looking for constructive criticism. I want you to be frank with me.'”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, “I’d have to go to court first and request a name change.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Friend Had Bad Luck
Joe: “My friend’s bakery burned down last night.”
Pete: “That’s too bad, Joe.”
Joe: “For sure, his business is now toast.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Dropping His Night Class
Joe: “I dropped out of my biology night class.”
Pete: “Did you have a work conflict?”
Joe: “No. I think the professor had two many skeletons in hsi closet.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Broke His Addiction
Joe: “I used to be addicted to not showering.”
Pete: “You’re not addicted anymore?”
Joe: “I’ve been clean for three years.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Has an Illogical F
Joe: “My psychologist told me my fear of speed bumps is illogical.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, “With a little time i’ll tet over it.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Quit His Job at Starbucks
Joe: “I quit my job at Starbucks.”
Pete: “Why?”
Joe: “I couldn’t stand the daily grind.
Today’s Joke: Joe Goes for His Annual Physical
Joe: “I went for my annual physical today. The doctor was late, and the receptionist said, “I’m sorry for your wait.”
Pete: “What did you say?”
Joe: “I said, ‘That’s okay, I’ve been fat all my life.'”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Careful Who He Listens To
Joe: “I told myself to stop drinking.”
Pete: “Are you going to do it?”
Joe: “No. Do you think I’m going to listen to a drunk giving me advice.”
