laugh out loud

Joe: “I named my dog 10K.”

Pete: “Is that because you run 10K’s?”

Joe: “No. I just want tell people I walk 10K every day.”

Joe: “Last week I ran a half marathon?”

Pete: “Really?”

Joe: “Nah. But it sounds better than saying I quit running half way through a marathon.”

Source

Joe: “My girlfriend had Covid and lost her sense of smell.”

Pete: “That’s too bad.”

Joe: “What I don’t understand is why she gets angry when I tell her she doesn’t smell good.”

Joe: “I told my girlfriend, men have feelings too. She asked me to give her an example.”

Pete: “What did you tell her.”

Joe: “I said, “I sometimes feel hungry and I sometimes feel sleepy.”

Joe: “My personal trainer asked me what was my favorite machine to use at the gym.”

Pete: “What did you say?”

Joe: “I said, ‘The vending machine.'”

Source

Joe: “My girlfriend asked me to go because I’m too lazy. She said, “Pack your close and leave.”

Pete: “What did you say?”

Joe: “I asked her if she wouldn’t mind packing them for me.”

Joe: “I’m considering a career in crime.”

Pete: “Are you going to run for governor?”

Joe: “My buddy Tom died while playing charades.”

Pete: “That’s too bad. What happened?”

Joe: “He was having a heart attack. His team were bad guessers.”

Joe: “My ex girlfriend used to love it when she’d come home and find me waiting for her.”

Pete: “What happened?”

Joe: “Now, when she finds me waiting for her, she calls the police.”

Joe: “My girlfriend got a tattoo of a chameleon.”

Pete: “What’s it look like?’

Joe: “That’s just it, I can’t see it.”