Joe: “I’m thinking of breaking up with my girlfriend.”
Pete: “What’s the problem?”
Joe: “She has multiple personalities and I’m bad with names.”
funny
Today’s Joke: Is Joe’s Grandfather Trying to Date?
Joe: “My grandfather asked a woman for her number.”
Pete: “Did she give him her number?”
Joe: Yes, she said, “It’s 149 over 98.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Gives His GF Advice
Joe: “My girlfriend was depressed. She said she felt like she was falling in a bottomless pit.”
Pete: “What did you say to her?”
Joe: “I said, ‘At least you won’t hit your head.'”
Today’s Joke: Joe Had an appointment with a Dermatologist
Joe: “I went to the dermatologist yesterday and she said I have a skin condition.”
Pete: “What is it?”
Joe: “Too much skin.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Broke His Glasses
Joe: “I broke my glasses yesterday.”
Pete: “How are you doing without them?”
Joe: “Okay, I guess. I have to drink out of my hands.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Going to Make His GF Happy
Joe: “I told my girlfriend I was going to make her the happiest woman in the world.”
Pete: “What did she say?”
Joe: “She said, ‘I’m going to miss you.'”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Wants Him to Start Going to the Gym
Joe: “My girlfriend has been bugging me to go to the gym so I’ve started resistance training.”
Pete: “What are you doing?”
Joe: “Refusing to go to the gym.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s Clairvoyant
Joe: “I can tell when people are being judgmental.”
Pete: “How do you do that, Joe?”
Joe: “Just by looking at them.”
Today’s Joke: Joe Goes to a Wedding
Joe: My two Wi-Fi friends got married.”
Pete: “How was the wedding?”
Joe: “The wedding was okay. The reception was great.”
Today’s Joke: Joe’s GF Gives Him Advice
Joe: “My girlfriend and I were cleaning our apartment when she hollered at me.”
Pete: “What did she say?”
Joe: “She said, “It’s a toilet brush not a microphone.”
